Online Dating Guide & Blog

I recently had a reader contact me to let me know that he was giving up on trying to use online dating. He listed several things that bothered him but a big part of his argument was this:

Online dating should come naturally and if it doesn’t come naturally for me, then I guess I shouldn’t be using it. Online dating is hard and that’s a problem…right?

I think the idea that online dating should come easy is a common misperception. [...]

Filed under: personal experience

In my last article I talked about taking your resolution seriously if you are resolving to date online. If you’ve not read that article already, I’d encourage you do do so.

I have a free online dating guide that you can download but I realize not everyone wants a full book on dating to read. Because of that, I wanted to list of a few of my articles that I think are most helpful to someone new to online dating:

Online Dating [...]

Filed under: dating links

We’re about to head into what is considered the busiest time for online dating. It turns out that more than a people will be resolving to stop being single and the population of the online dating services is about to spike.

If you’re considering making such dating resolution this year and plan to use online dating as a part of that resolution, I’d like to encourage you to do the following:

Filed under: dating advice

When I talk about what I think makes for a good first email, one thing I’ve argued in the past is that you shouldn’t be talking about yourself in one of these emails. As I’ve said, your profile is the place to talk about yourself, not your first email.

In this article I want to use an example to show why I think talking about yourself is a mistake. Also, I’ve been contacted by some men recently who complain that they [...]

Filed under: dating advice

How should someone with a visible disability approach revealing this information when dating online? A few times in the past year I’ve been contacted by readers who have had this question.

I’ve always tried to handle answering this question carefully because I can’t fully appreciate the situation. I think I can empathize well but when it comes right down to it, I’ve never walked in their shoes. I’ve warned readers who have contacted me of my limited experience…but they still seem [...]

Filed under: dating advice

Have you found success with online dating but now you or your significant other is struggling to admit to others how you met? Believe it or not, my wife and I have actually been there as well.

At a company Christmas party several years ago we were in a group of at least 6 people (perhaps more, my memory fails me) and everyone was talking about how they met. When it came to my wife and I, we weren’t embarrassed: we [...]

Filed under: personal experience

I have a friend named Kate Houston who I have talked about from time to time on this website. She runs a really unique service: she helps people write great online dating profiles in really unique ways. I like her work because she helps people “market” themselves instead of just “talk” about themselves…and I think there’s a big difference! You can see some examples of how she’s helped people at her website TrySweetTalk.com.

Recently, Kate was interviewed by the TV channel [...]

Filed under: dating profiles

I’ve discussed writing first emails a good deal both on this site and in my free dating guide. One thing I’ve discussed in these areas is that I’ve never liked is the “form” email: where the guy writes one email and then plugs each woman’s information in to make it appear personalized.

Recently, a reader wrote me asking if I would review his general approach to writing emails. In this case, he was using a form email but I could tell [...]

Filed under: online dating guide

I’ve already shared my thoughts on how I recommend creating a dating profile in my article Step-by-Step Guide to Creating Your Dating Profile..

The truth is, I run this site and give dating advice in my spare time…which means I don’t have nearly enough time to help rewrite all of my readers profiles. So my goal all along with my step-by-step profile creation article was to enable people to improve their profiles without needing me.

Recently I was contacted by someone regarding [...]

Filed under: dating profiles

I was recently contacted by a reader asking that I review his first email style and when doing so I was reminded of what I talk about in my guide:

Sometimes the most important thing to do when dating online is to just come off as normal!

Perhaps more than anywhere else in life, normal can be exceptional with online dating. I say this because of the weirdness that can go on with online dating. Having a guy just write you a [...]

Filed under: dating advice

A reader wrote in that he was talking with a woman on an online dating service but she was very nervous about actually meeting someone using the service. Here’s his question:

I’ve been emailing a girl on Match.com for a couple of weeks now, and I’m struggling to work out where I stand, and how best to develop the email conversation into a real date. The girl has a really nice profile but took a few days to respond to my [...]

Filed under: dating advice

A reader who was diligent about taking my advice recently wrote me. While he offered many compliments (which I’m happy to share!) he also pointed out some gaps in my dating guide in regards to having early success:

I stumbled on your site a couple months ago after considering getting serious about online dating after using okcupid in an extremely passive way for about 6 months. I was looking for advice that didn’t entail sleeping around. I too am an [...]

Filed under: online dating guide